If I could get on the show, I would. Seriously.
Only problem: I’m not a millionaire. Dang it.
But maybe someday …
I watched my first episode of the popular reality show Millionaire Matchmaker recently, and I’m hooked. I understand all the buzz, which I’d been ignoring since the show began five years ago.
Here’s the premise: An attractive 40ish woman named Patti Stanger runs a matchmaking service for the rich and beautiful. A lovelorn man or woman meets with her, talks about their dating pasts, interests and what they’re looking for in a mate. Patti interviews potential matches and then brings in a handful to meet with her client (maybe Kim Kardashian should’ve hooked up with Patti–I’m still not convinced her marriage will last).
On the episode I watched, Patti was trying to find a match for Brandon, a 34-year-old apparel company owner, and William, a 31-year-old investment manager.
Brandon was the better catch by far. He had a dark complexion with wavy black hair and an easygoing, likeable manner. William, by contrast, was pasty white, had a receding hairline and mistakenly thought he was cool.
Patti can be brutally honest (borderline cruel) with her clients – and that’s the appeal of the show. She diagnoses their dating problem, gives advice, then ridicules them if they don’t follow it.
She’s like a female drill sergeant, trying to get her clients in shape so they can achieve their goal of finding love.
“Phony baloney” – that’s how Patti describes William at first.
“Oh, Mr. Player is in the house,” she says sarcastically when he’s talking to women at a mixer.
William was sort of pathetic. He claimed to have a net worth of $20-25 million, yet he was a mama’s boy who said the match had to be acceptable to his mother.
Listen, if he hadn’t had a fat bank account (allegedly), none of the hot female matches Patti lined up would have shown any interest. In fact, the two women William chose for dates both rejected him – ouch!
However, William redeemed himself afterward. Patti picked a woman for him, and he trusted her choice.
“I have a hard time accepting advice on romantic matters,” William says. “But I don’t have a very good track record.”
At this point, I could relate to William. Clearly, with two divorces behind me, I’m an awful wife-picker. I have some ideas why my marriages have failed, but I can’t guarantee I’d make a better choice the next time.
That’s why I’d welcome advice from Patti. I’ll bet some of you guys would too. I hope you would.
If not, you’re saying you’ve got the relationship game all figured out. And that’s a dangerous position. You’re setting yourself up for more failure.
The men who succeed on Millionaire Matchmaker are the ones who face reality: They’re screw-ups in love. And they’re open to a dating makeover.
At the end of the episode I watched, both William and Brandon find true love. Surprise! Patti isn’t going to air her failures.
I’m normally turned off by reality shows. I think they’re hokey, contrived and don’t portray reality at all.
But Millionaire Matchmaker does. Whether we’re rich or poor, beautiful or ugly, we all want love. Simple as that.
I’d recommend watching Millionaire Matchmaker. You may see yourself in one of the characters. And you might have a dating revelation that changes your life. (It’s on Bravo every Thursday at 9 p.m./8 central, but you can catch reruns throughout the week.)
If you continually fail with women, there’s probably a reason. Read some books. Talk to people you trust. Perhaps even see a counselor. If you want a lifelong partner, make sure you’re ready to attract one.