I’ve spanked my son. Not very often, but a handful of times over the years.
All the spankings were a heat-of-the-moment thing. Connor, who is 11 now, said or did something I considered way out of bounds, and I lost my composure.
I’m not proud of the fact that I spanked him, and I hope I never do again. There are many other more effective, more rational ways to discipline a kid and teach him a lesson.
I’ll never understand parents who spank their kids viciously and in a pre-determined manner as a regular form of correction.
Have you been following the story of a Texas judge, Williams Adams, who whipped his teenage daughter with a belt several years ago? It’s very disturbing.
His daughter, who is 23 now, secretly videotaped her dad beating her when she was 16. He was mad because she illegally downloaded content off the Internet.
Obviously, there are some weird family dynamics going on here. Why would a dad decide to brutally spank his teen for this offense? Why would the daughter have set up a video camera before the beating occurred? And why would she release the video, which has gone viral, now?
Those are questions that we may not be able to answer. They’re secondary, in my mind, to the larger parental question of spanking.
The video is horrifying
Watch the nearly eight-minute video of the dad assaulting his daughter – if you can. It’s sickening, really.
“Bend over the f*ing bed, dammit,” Adams says as he repeatedly whips the girl with a belt. “Lay down or I’ll spank your f*ing face…I have to f*ing beat you into submission.”
If this video doesn’t make you an opponent of spanking, I don’t know what will. Again, this dad didn’t whip his daughter spontaneously in the heat of the moment.
That’s bad enough. But he took time to grab a belt from another room and talk to her for a few moments before starting the beating. He had plenty of time to change his mind, but he didn’t.
Judge Adams is upset that the video has been released. But he’s also tried to minimize his action.
“It’s not as bad as it looks on tape,” he said.
What? It’s every bit as bad as it looks.
As a parent, you have to make your own decision about spanking. I’m not going to get on an anti-spanking crusade.
I would just say, think before you spank. Is that really what you want to do? Why? There are no better alternatives?
Kids are going to anger and infuriate us at times. That’s a given. But it’s not a given how we’ll respond.
We have a choice.
Maybe the video of the child-beating will cause parents to question the idea of spanking. I hope so.